Okay, is it just me, or did everyone else miss the memo that you can board early without buying a fancy seat or paying extra? I swear, these airline loyalty programs have all these sneaky perks—like, yeah, you get to pick your seat before the masses, and suddenly it’s like you’re in some secret club. […]

Staring at those crime maps again—yeah, I know, I’m that person. “Danger zones” everywhere, Willowbrook supposedly sketchier than 74% of cities, at least if you believe the stats: 34.16 crimes per 1,000 residents. But honestly? Every actual local I’ve bugged about it just kind of shrugs and says, “It’s not bad, especially if you know […]

Is it just me, or does nobody in my family actually pay attention to exchange rates until someone’s already over budget and grumpy in the group chat? I mean, everyone’s busy arguing about which hotel points to hoard, but meanwhile, the USD is stomping all over the Yen in Japan. Suddenly, I’m daydreaming about endless […]

Let’s just get this out of the way: booking direct with the cruise line doesn’t guarantee you a bargain. Learned that the hard way. Thought I was being clever, skipping the “middleman,” clicking “Book Now” on the cruise line’s website. Then my friend, who uses some travel agent who still faxes things (who even owns […]

So, here’s me, staring at my last rental car bill, wondering who invented the $22 “convenience” fee and why nobody at the counter even tries to warn you. I’m convinced the entire industry is a running joke my neighbor’s brother (travel agent, 19 years, apparently a rental car oracle) is in on. He just snorts […]

So I’m sitting there on embarkation day thinking, “Alright, I’ve got this—Wi-Fi? Paid. Drinks? Paid. What else could possibly pop up?” And right then, some crew member hands me a slip and, oh, cool, the cruise line just jacked up the automatic gratuity. Didn’t warn me. Sometimes they do it between sailings, like it’s a […]

I keep thinking there’s gotta be a way to dodge the Instagram mobs and still end up somewhere worth the airfare, but every “secret” getaway is just another parade of identical cocktails and lobster-red tourists. Is there an actual hidden spot left? I mean, I’ve scrolled through so many “expert” roundups my thumbs are sore, […]

So, you know those emails that cruise lines love to send? “Special upgrade opportunity!”—blah blah, all noise, never actually the thing you want. What’s hilarious is, the “category upgrades” get plastered everywhere, but the real upgrade—the one where you magically end up in a balcony or suite for peanuts—never gets a mention. It’s like a […]

So, look, I’ve been herding people onto cruise ships for over a decade, and you’d think I’d have seen it all. Nope. Port fees still sneak up on me like that one roommate who “forgets” their share of rent. And don’t even get me started on how a cruise you thought you budgeted for suddenly […]

Look, every time I see one of those “hot deal” cruise ads, I just roll my eyes—does anyone actually talk about all the sneaky little things that nuke your bill? Last cruise, I watched people fork over full price for drink packages while I wandered off, found the loyalty lounge, and scored free espresso and […]